dong bang shin ki / super junior | JaeMin, JaeHae, YehHae
PG-13 - NC-17 / drama, angst, humor, romance
They say love waits. But the question always is, until when? Jaejoong and Donghae face more questions about things they think they should stop thinking about. And while everyone drowns in their own thoughts, Yehsung gets someone who's willing to hold his hand.
[crossposted at hug______, miracle______, _starcandy.]
Author’s Notes: I know it’s been almost three months since the last update and I’m sorry. Life caught up with me and the muses were on leave for a very long time. Hopefully, you guys haven’t left me while I was gone. This chapter underwent a lot of changes, most of them were made just before I decided to publish it, and those changes will affect the next chapters. So pay attention to everything, ne? They’re all going to be important.
Disclaimers: None of the Dong Bang Shin Ki and Super Junior boys are mine, only the plot is.
No Show Fee : Time Restriction
Heechul squinted through his dark sunglasses. He checked his watch then the board near him. Leeteuk’s flight touched down half an hour ago. Surely, Heechul thought, their former leader would be waving madly at his direction any minute now.
Two days ago, Leeteuk had called him and told him that he was flying back to Korea. When Heechul asked why, Leeteuk didn’t explain. He just told Heechul his flight details and to meet him there at the airport. Heechul asked again; come alone, Leeteuk said and then put the phone down. It was one of those times, Heechul thought as he flipped his mobile phone open—Geng, he said—where Leeteuk decided to play the frustrating double-o-seven.
How’s the world doing? He smiled; Han Geng obviously remembered that last call he placed a few months back. The world might be in for more trouble, he typed; Jungsu’s coming back. Heechul sent the message, hoping Han Geng would reply immediately. He scanned the crowd for Leeteuk’s familiar head and spotted him in sapphire blue winter clothes; still a Super Junior member until the end, he noted, amused at their former leader’s choice of color.
“Hey,” Leeteuk greeted in a voice that didn’t sound like the Leeteuk on the phone. “Hey,” he greeted back; he looked around. “You’re alone?” Leeteuk just nodded—offering no explanation yet again, Heechul noted, frustratingly—“Let’s go before the fans recognize us,” he said before Heechul could say anything else. The latter shrugged and let the matter drop, vowing to get answers from Leeteuk soon.
It was a silent fifteen-minute walk to the parking lot.
“Why are you here?” Heechul asked as soon as his car hit the road; it was safe to talk about these things now, he assumed. Leeteuk had taken one of his jackets off and, the other noted, the older one looked as if he hadn’t been eating well. “Jungsu?”
“Jongwoon called me a few days ago.”
“He always calls you, Jungsu.”
“He’s going to protect Jaejoong and Donghae.”
“What?” Heechul exclaimed, looking sharply at Leeteuk. “Eyes on the road, Heechul,” Leeteuk reminded him. The younger one glared at Leeteuk—he knew how Heechul hated to be treated like that but here was Park Jungsu, doing everything Heechul hated—but did as he was told.
His phone rang. “That’s Geng,” Heechul said. “Get it for me, will you?”
“Ni hao,” Leeteuk greeted, voice cheery. Heechul rolled his eyes; Han Geng would be able to hear through that mask, he wanted to say but remained silent. “Heechul’s driving. Youngwoon’s not—yes. Hm. I’ll tell him what?” Leeteuk raised an eyebrow. “Oh. The world will—okay. I’ll tell him that.” There was a pause; Heechul could hear Han Geng’s voice, telling Leeteuk something that sounded like—he chuckled inwardly—reminders. “Give my love to Zhou Mi and Henry, will you? Okay. Bye, Geng.”
“He says the world will have to wait for a superhero. I don’t know what he means by that,” Leeteuk said as soon as he put the phone down. Heechul just shrugged; it meant that Han Geng won’t be able to fly back to Korea. There was silence for a few minutes; Heechul wanted Leeteuk to continue what he was saying but their former leader looked like he was carrying the whole world on his shoulders again.
“It’s not that I don’t trust you,” Leeteuk said, finally breaking the silence just as Heechul was about to park. “But I just couldn’t stand being away anymore. I know you’ve been a great hyung—holding the fort and keeping them as safe as much you can—but I’m still your leader, disbanded or not. And—”
“I understand,” Heechul said, cutting Leeteuk’s flow of words. He would’ve probably done the same thing if he was in Leeteuk’s place. The latter smiled, swinging an arm around Heechul. “Thanks,” he said, sounding like the Park Jungsu he has known for almost all his life. “Did you tell Jongwoon? That you were coming back, I mean,” Heechul asked as they took the elevator towards his pad. Leeteuk’s radiant smile turned sheepish. The director raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t tell—Jungsu!”
“I wanted to surprise him!”
Heechul punched Leeteuk’s arm. “Bullshit, Jungsu! For all I know, Jongwoon didn’t even want you to come back!” Leeteuk whistled looking elsewhere. “What floor are you in again?” he asked in an attempt to change the conversation. “Oh that tactic is not going to work on me, Park! You explain to me right now—” The elevator dinged and the doors opened (“Fifteenth, huh,” Leeteuk murmured, getting out of the elevator; Heechul followed, hot on his heels.). “—why the hell you wanted me to be an accessory to your crime! He’s going to have my head when he finds out about this and God knows how much I love my—”
“I can hear you from my sound proof work room, Heechul hy—” Yehsung opened the door, shouting over Heechul’s complains. His eyes widened when he saw the man standing beside Heechul. “Jungsu hyung?” Leeteuk smiled brightly, opening his arms wide. “Missed me?”
After several minutes of giggling, glomping and endless hugging, Leeteuk settled on the plush sofa with Yehsung and Donghae on either side of him. Heechul had gone to help Jaejoong in the kitchen, fully knowing that every Super Junior member available would be pouring in in the next few hours. Yoochun, Junsu and Yunho had also been informed of Leeteuk’s sudden homecoming and they said they would be dropping in soon. Changmin was a subject Jaejoong did not include but he knew his former band mates would inform him as well.
Heechul watched as Jaejoong made magic in the kitchen, happy that he had decided to take his dongsaeng in. He would never have been treated to the homemade dishes that Jaejoong always made for them. And what a waste it would’ve been, Heechul thought.
“What are you making?” he asked; Jaejoong’s shoulders were tense and he knew that only one person would be responsible for it. “Takoyaki,” Jaejoong replied, lips pursed. Heechul raised an eyebrow. “Takoyaki? Did Jungsu say anything about craving something Japanese?” Jaejoong nodded absently, gently putting what seemed to be—Heechul’s eyes widened—chocolate and wasabi into the mix. He was about to comment on the weird combination—never mind that Tohoshinki has proven that it tasted good—when the doorbell rang.
“That must be them,” Heechul said.
Jaejoong’s shoulders tensed even more, causing him to drop the teaspoon he was holding. “Shit,” he cursed softly, bending down to retrieve the teaspoon. Heechul watched, eyes softening. He wanted to protect Jaejoong, too, he thought, remembering Leeteuk’s reason for coming back. He wanted to see Jaejoong happy again; smiling and laughing at just about anything. Yet he knew that if Jaejoong was happy with Donghae, someone else would suffer.
He hated how this world worked, really.
It almost felt like a party, Donghae thought as he watched his friends eat and drink. Super Junior wasn’t complete—what with Han Geng, Zhou Mi and Henry in China, Kangin in another part of the world, Kyuhyun, Kibum and Siwon busy with work—but it was alright; it was as close to complete as they’ll ever be on such a short notice. Plus, he could see their dongsaeng-deul—forever their dongsaeng, Donghae thought with a laugh—and that made him happy.
“Hey,” Leeteuk said, taking the empty seat beside him. “Why are you alone?” Donghae shrugged, taking a bite of the takoyaki Jaejoong made. “Jaejoong hyung doesn’t like being bothered in the kitchen. I know better than to go there and try to spend quality time with him.” Leeteuk laughed and Donghae smiled; he missed that laugh, he thought. “Ne, hyung. I’m glad you’re back.”
Leeteuk grinned, looking like the twenty-something year old Super Junior leader he once was. “Missed me that much, Hae?” The younger one chuckled. “Well, yeah. But mostly because I know it means so much to Jongwoon hyung that you’re here.” Leeteuk’s gaze trailed away, eyes searching for his dongsaeng, finding him in the midst of a conversation with Jonghyun and Onew. “You think so?”
“I know so, hyung. You make Jongwoon hyung happy.”
The former Super Junior leader caught Yehsung’s eyes, smiling softly as the latter waved at them to come closer. “I don’t need to come home to make Jongwoon happy, Donghae.” The younger one cocked his head to the side, unable to fathom what Leeteuk was saying.
“Look at him,” was all Leeteuk said before leaving Donghae to his thoughts.
Jaejoong sat outside the recording studio and watched as Yoochun started recording his part in the latest single the duo will release in a few months time. A small smile escaped his lips when he recognized the song; it was the one Yoochun was composing the night he had a fight with Junsu. “What’s the title of the song?” he asked Junsu who was sitting beside him. “You know the song?” Junsu asked, surprised. Jaejoong hummed a few bars, his memory of that night still crisp in his mind. “He wrote that when he stayed with me for a few days.”
There was a tinge of sadness in Jaejoong’s eyes, Junsu noted as he watched the older one close his eyes and immerse himself in the song. It has been a long time, he thought, since he had heard Jaejoong sing. It was as if Jaejoong had buried the singer in him when Dong Bang Shin Ki disbanded. When Changmin left.
“He’s half a year too late, Junsu,” Jaejoong suddenly said, turning towards him. “Actually, he’s a lifetime too late.” Junsu reached out to hold Jaejoong’s hand, squeezing it affectionately. He couldn’t blame Jaejoong, really. The former lead singer had tried telling Changmin just how much he loved him but the younger one never took him seriously. Jaejoong had tried waiting, tried being aggressive—but all these had failed. And Jaejoong was tired, too tired to wait again.
“Maybe it’s better late than never, hyung.”
“I would have been happy with never, Su.”
Jaejoong sighed, putting his head on Junsu’s shoulder. “I’m already happy with Donghae, Junsu. Changmin—coming back like that and suddenly telling me that he has realized that he loves me is just going to destroy my present with Donghae. And I’m happy with my present. I love the present.”
For a while there, Junsu thought, he wanted to ask Changmin to just go back to Canada and leave Jaejoong with Donghae. Their magnae was destroying the happiness Jaejoong deserved after years of waiting and he was Jaejoong’s friend; he would do everything to keep Jaejoong happy. This was the reason why Yoochun and Yunho were against this in the first place. They should never meddle with hearts, Junsu thought, but a part of him continued to tell him that they should.
“Changmin is your past and Donghae is your present,” he said, voice soft. “But who is your future, hyung? Do you see Donghae there or is it still Changmin standing at the end of the road?” Jaejoong stiffened at this, unsure on how to answer his dongsaeng. He wanted to say ‘Donghae’ because if there was someone he wanted to be with right now, it was Donghae. And he knew Donghae felt the same way. “Maybe you shouldn’t have let go, hyung. Maybe you should’ve held on a while long—”
“But that’s the thing.”
Junsu blinked. “I’m not sure I understand, hyung.”
“I had nothing to hold onto, Junsu. How can you say I shouldn’t have let go?”
It had been Leeteuk’s idea, really. Had it been all up to Yehsung, he would’ve spent the day reading his long-neglected books or perhaps, reading the script for the shooting. But no; Leeteuk had to suggest that they go out and have fun.
Yehsung sighed. Actually, Saitoh wasn’t the real reason why he hated this idea. It was his excuse, his way of telling Leeteuk that he needed to talk to him. He was here now, not in some other part of the world, and this was his opportunity to stop playing the hyung and be Leeteuk’s dongsaeng. Apparently, this wasn’t in Leeteuk’s current itinerary.
“You’re always a million miles away, Jongwoon-kun.”
He glanced at the taller man beside him, not at all surprised that Saitoh was there. He had gotten used to Saitoh’s habit of always popping up out of nowhere. “I thought you were getting some ice cream with Donghae.” Saitoh smiled. “Teukie-kun told me to leave the ice cream-picking to him and Donghae-kun.” He leaned down, making sure that his lips were hovering near Yehsung’s ear. “That and I didn’t want to leave you alone.”
The former lead singer rolled his eyes. Trust Saitoh to flirt with him whenever the opportunity presented itself. “I haven’t been not alone in a long time, Saitoh-san.” It wasn’t the type of answer he usually gave the older man when he was flirty—he usually didn’t answer, really—but that just rolled out of his tongue. Not that he filtered his words with the Japanese actor—Heechul was rubbing off on him, dammit—but he wasn’t the type of person to say something to personal to a stranger.
Okay. So Saitoh wasn’t exactly a stranger but Saitoh wasn’t really his friend either. Well, fine; Saitoh was a friend but he wasn’t close enough a friend to be talking about something per—
“So have I.”
Donghae looked over the wide variety of ice cream flavors. He didn’t know that it was already possible to have wasabi ice cream or dragon fruit ice cream. It made him think of the last time he had ice cream; when was that again? “I wonder if Teukie hyung would like the dragon fruit one,” he wondered aloud.
“Actually, that’s worth trying.”
He turned around, eyes widening at the sight of Leeteuk standing behind him. “Hyung! Why are you here?” He looked around. “Where’s Saitoh-san?” Super Junior’s former leader smiled, putting an arm around him. “I sent him away.” Donghae blinked. “Away?” he asked. By away, he thought, did Leeteuk mean he sent Saitoh away forever? Somehow, that last part really excited him.
“I sent him to accompany Jongwoon while we’re here—”
Donghae’s eyes widened. “You sent him to Jongwoon hyung?”
“Yup,” Leeteuk chirped, scanning the ice cream cans in front of them. “I think we should just get the strawberry cheesecake flavor for Jongwoon and the wasabi one for Takumi hyung.” Donghae blinked. “Ta-takumi hyung?” He couldn’t believe it; not even Yehsung, who was known for being polite, called the older Japanese actor hyung. “Well, he is older than me so it’s only right for me to call him that, ne?”
“B-but—” he started; Leeteuk looked at him, questioning eyes completely innocent. Donghae sighed in frustration. “Aish. That doesn’t matter right now. You said you sent him to accompany Jongwoon hyung?” Leeteuk nodded. “Yes and I think they should be spending more time with each other.” He paused, seeing how furious Donghae was. “What the heck is wrong with you, Lee Donghae?” he asked, pulling Donghae’s arm before his dongsaeng could leave him. “There’s nothing wrong with leaving Jongwoon with Takumi hyung—”
“There is,” Donghae hissed, releasing himself from Leeteuk’s hold.
Leeteuk blinked. “What?”
“You left Jongwoon hyung with Saitoh Takumi, hyung. Everything is wrong with that.”
Saitoh sighed. “It’s kind of hard to be not alone when you’re in this industry, ne Jongwoon?” The younger singer was supposed to say something about how familiar Saitoh thought he was—discussing such things—but something in the Japanese actor’s eyes and voice made Yehsung bite his tongue down. He recognized that look, that tone.
“Maybe,” he said in a quiet voice. It was a little noisy, what with the wind and the crowd, and he wasn’t sure if Saitoh would hear him. “Maybe we could try not being alone. You know, together.” The Japanese actor’s eyes widened, hidden questions in its depth. He could try answering them but now wasn’t the time and here wasn’t the place. That and if he did try to answer them, Yehsung knew he would probably retract his statement earlier. And with that look on Saitoh’s face, that wasn’t the road he should be taking.
“I’d love to do that, Jongwoon.”
Leeteuk watched as Donghae tried his best to keep up with Yehsung and Saitoh’s conversation, making sure that Yehsung would remain by his side in the entire duration of the trip. The former Super Junior leader had succeeded in preventing Donghae from ‘rescuing’ (Donghae’s words) Yehsung from Saitoh but it was by no means easy. It had been a long time since Leeteuk had put his foot forward when discussing personal affairs with his friends but they all knew that in those rare times that he did, he had their best interest at heart.
And so Donghae had stayed with him, buying ice cream for all four of them.
He sighed as he saw Donghae put an arm around Yehsung’s smaller frame, earning a surprised look from the latter. Saitoh, however, continued on with the conversation, seemingly unaffected with Donghae’s sudden possessiveness towards Yehsung. It was all pretend, Leeteuk thought; Yehsung was pretending that this was normal Donghae-behavior (well, actually, Leeteuk thought, it was normal Donghae-behavior); Saitoh was pretending to see nothing. Leeteuk was pretending he did not see that look on Donghae’s eyes.
There was a mixture of frustration, confusion and determination in them but his dongsaeng kept them shielded from everyone. If he weren’t Leeteuk, Super Junior’s mighty leader, he wouldn’t have seen it, too. (Donghae was thinking about Jaejoong and Yehsung, that he was sure about; what else could that look mean?) But years of being Leeteuk had taught him that everyone could lie with virtually every part of his body but his eyes.
He sighed. Maybe, he thought, he should’ve helped Heechul earlier.
(“Is there something wrong, Donghae?” Jaejoong asked later that night. His boyfriend had been acting strange, eyes glazed and eyebrows meeting in the middle of his forehead. Donghae had always been a thinker but that look on his face was not thoughtful. It was confusion.
“I—” He paused and Jaejoong waited. Donghae was trying to phrase his thoughts into coherent sentences. “It’s just that I feel very protective towards Jongwoon hyung.” Jaejoong raised an eyebrow and crossed his legs; he didn’t say anything. “Today, when we were out with Jungsu hyung and Saitoh-san, I felt very protective of him especially when Saitoh-san was too close to him. I don’t know why but Saitoh-san feels like this evil wizard who’s going to snatch away my hyung.” Donghae sighed, a frustrated laughter spilling from his lips. “It sounds silly, doesn’t it?”
Jaejoong smiled. He gestured for Donghae to come closer and join him on the bed. He wrapped his arms around Donghae, pulling him close. “My baby seems very protective of his hyung,” he said, chuckling. Donghae’s eyes widened. “You don’t find it weird? You’re not even jealous?” Jaejoong shook his head. “Nah. I completely understand, dongsaeng. Saitoh-san is the evil Ursula who wants to snatch away our dear Jongwoon hyung for his own—”
“You’re not taking me seriously!”
“I am, I am!” Donghae pouted, causing the older one to grin. “Fine, I’ll stop it with the Disney references. That good for you?” Donghae shrugged, trying to act as if it wasn’t; Jaejoong shook his head, amused. “Well anyway, as I was saying, I understand, Hae. That and well—” He paused, eyes twinkling. “Well?” Donghae asked, curious. Jaejoong’s lips curved into a small smile before meeting Donghae’s own lips. It was a short kiss, one that left them wanting for more but Jaejoong had something to say and Donghae was waiting for that.
“That and I know you love me.”
Donghae’s eyes brightened. “Quite confident about that, hm?”
“Oh yes, Lee Donghae. Quite confident.”)
Changmin crossed out the last day of their two-week preparation for the second season of the drama Heechul was directing. Tomorrow, he thought; tomorrow, he would start working with Jaejoong again. Tomorrow would mark the beginning of a war, a battle he didn’t know if he could win. He sighed.
He turned around to see Yunho leaning on the door. He smiled; he knew that Yunho was still against this but still their former leader had opened his door and let him stay. And for that he was grateful. “Are you ready for tomorrow’s shooting?” Yunho asked. Changmin nodded. He had memorized every line, every scene he was in—even those he wasn’t (a.k.a. Jaejoong’s scenes).
(For a moment, he remembered Kibum. He remembered Kibum’s lips, his voice—everything that made that kiss Kibum. And he remembered his confusion, his frustration, his unanswered questions. Perhaps it was best that he called Kibum again and ask what that was about. But he was too scared that he might’ve known the answer all along. That—)
“Do you really want to fight for Jae?” Yunho asked, voice a notch lower. He was serious, Changmin could see, and he knew that if Yunho wanted, he would do everything in his power to protect Jaejoong and Donghae. “There is no assurance, Changmin, that you’d win.”
“I know,” he answered, the look on Donghae’s eyes still fresh in his mind. “But I need to risk it, hyung. I was stupid enough to let him slip away.” Yunho gave him a curt nod as if agreeing but to which statement, Changmin wasn’t really sure.
“He’s moved on, you know.”
“Yeah but I’ll just have to catch up, won’t I?”
“That’s quite a long run you’ve got ahead of you, Shim Changmin.”
2o | 22
No Show Fee: o1 | o2 | o3 | o4 | o5.a | o5.b | o6 | st, boarding pass | o7.a | o7.b. | o7.c | o7.d | o8.a | o8.b | o8.c | o8.d | o8.e | o9 | 1o | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 2o